Mirroring your dog during play can help you connect and co-regulate. Play-fighting is a great way to regulate the nervous system and start to feel safety within activated states.
Your dog should have a soft mouth when you play! Raise the intensity slowly to be sure you don't trigger a traumatized dog.
You want your dog (and yourself) to stay within the window of tolerance.
Play serves as a co-regulating tool because the process of interacting with others during play creates a shared emotional experience that influences both individuals' nervous systems, helping them to regulate emotions, manage stress, and develop self-regulation skills.
Dogs will typically only play when they feel safe, so it becomes an important signpost or milestone when your dog is able to play with you! And when they are unable to engage in play, it could be a sign that you need to adjust the environment or work on creating more safety for your dog's nervous system to engage in social play.
Play can also be the activity that helps up- or down-regulate your dog when they need help or feel stressed. But it is important not to be overly pushy or forceful when trying to get a shy, nervous, or over-stimulated dog to play. You could be bitten by an over-threshold dog, or you might push the dog further into shut down because they are already overwhelmed.
